William Perkins once wrote,
Those families wherein this service of God [family worship] is performed, are (as it were) little churches, yea, even a kind of Paradise upon earth.
William Perkins
When I thought of family worship, I imagined a family gathered around the Father reading a captivating bible story while Mother holds baby and the children sit cross legged, leaning in eagerly to hear more. This was my vision for family worship, but as it were, it was nothing like that. The last words I would use to describe our family worship over the last 2 years would be “Paradise on earth.” Unless your Paradise includes temper tantrums, breaking up fights, poopy diapers and tripping over musical toys.
It hasn’t been all chaos though, there have been great moments of family bonding, scripture memorization wins and plenty of hilarious stories. Family worship is not easy, especially with infants and toddlers. However, it is an absolute necessity for every Christian family to fight to establish a family worship routine in their home. After all, no one said establishing a kind of “Paradise on earth” would be an easy or smooth process. Here are a few tips from my first 2 years of leading family worship with an infant and toddlers that will hopefully embolden you to get started.
1. Just Start
The first thing you got to do, is just start. If you think about it too much, you’ll never do it. Just start doing something, even if it’s just reading 1 passage and praying for 10 seconds, start somewhere and build on it.
2. Keep it simple
You don’t have to be a seminary educated Pastor to lead your family in worship. In our case I am a seminary level educated Pastor, but if I’m honest that was probably a bug not a feature. I thought we needed to have a Sunday morning level worship service. After I broke out of that paradigm in my mind, things got a lot better. We started with singing 2 easy songs, and reading from a simple family devotional.
3. Don’t worry if you miss a day
You will miss days, you will forget, don’t sweat it just pick off where you left off. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself if you get sick, take a few days off.
4. Persevere through the madness
If you have multiple toddlers or infants, you will have to persevere through a lot. Be prepared to feel like you are speaking into the void. Do it anyway. Are your kids running around, hyper as a hedgehog and won’t settle to do the scripture memorization? Do it anyways. I have found that 9 times out of 10, if you just start repeating the words, they will slow down and join you. Is one kid throwing a tantrum, go through the routine anyway, fight through the noise and just do it. Don’t give up, these are the hard moments where good habits are solidified.
5. Change it up Occasionally
Family worship with young kids is a lot like a workout routine, you need to change it up occasionally to shock the body back into growth mode. Young kids need a different angle and a change up to the routine to maintain their interest. Don’t get too drastic though. Sing a different song, change up the order of activities, or incorporate new objects.
6. Try Different Devotionals
Is there a family devotional you want to try out? Do it. But be prepared to ditch it if it’s not going well. Don’t feel bad if a program or devotional just isn’t working, keep going until you find something that does work with your family.
7. Make Family Worship a Time of Peace
This is often hard. It’s easy to get frustrated when things aren’t going well and to be visibly annoyed or begin yelling at the children to get in line. I have failed in this more times than I’d like to admit. You don’t want your children to associate family worship with chaos, arguments, and anger. Even if your children are running amuck during family worship, remain stoic and at peace. Obviously if they are doing something dangerous or having a sibling tussle you must intervene but work hard to cultivate a time of balance and peace.
8. Laugh and Be Lighthearted
There will indeed be many instances where your children say outrageous things. Don’t be afraid to laugh. One time one of our children was learning the Lord’s Prayer and said, “Our Father whose name is Kevin, hallowed be your Dave…. Give us this day some yummy bread.” Aside from God’s name being Kevin and hallowing His “Dave”, I think asking God to give us some yummy bread is not too far off what Jesus was teaching us anyways.
9. Look at the Big Picture
We began a family worship routine when our twins were 2 years old. Most of the time it was just me reading a short devotional while my wife and kids listened. How much of the devotional did our children grasp? Probably none of it, but that wasn’t the point. Think of family worship as a child walking in his father’s shoes. At first the child is so small that he can’t move, soon enough he is shuffling and before you know it the shoes fit. The point here is not to expect our 2,3 and 4 year old’s to be bible scholars right away and begin to apply what we as adults often struggle with applying. The point is to build a routine of worship into their lives. It’s a lot easier to get a teenager to participate in family worship, when that is all they’ve ever known. Build the good habits now and keep the big picture in mind during this season in which family worship may seem like a fruitless endeavor. You never reap what you sow in the same season.
10. Celebrate Any and All Wins
Did your child recite a bible verse perfectly? Celebrate it. Did you have a time of family worship where no one cried, threw a tantrum, or ran off to play with their toys? Celebrate it. Did you notice one of your children sing a whole hymn? Celebrate it. Take time to celebrate the little things God is doing.
If a generation of Christian parents with young children will commit to daily family worship, I am convinced that God will work a miracle in our nation within a single generation. If we want to see reform in the church and repentance in our land, we must revive family worship. Every Father must be a pastor to his own home and every home must be, as it were, a little church, yes, even a kind of paradise on Earth.
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